That’s what I said to my husband last night as we ate dinner at the Olive Garden.

“See honey, I am easy to please- all I want is Target and The Olive Garden”

Mm. Mm. Mm! It was SO yummy!

I wasn’t looking for roses or cards or flowers- so my Hubby wasn’t out there last minute trying to scoop up what flowers were left.

Nope.

Hubby offered to buy me a Coach purse or an Ed Hardy purse at Dillard’s for Mother’s Day and I said no (shocker, huh?) because the reality is I don’t go anywhere to carry a purse. I’ve got cute purses sitting in their dust bags in the bottom of my closet on the FLOOR! (I’ll sell ‘em to you- $100 a piece- lol) When we do venture out, the only bag I’m carrying is a diaper bag- usually full of toys, food and other forms of entertainment to stop my daughter from embarrassing the shit out of me in public.

I woke up yesterday morning and kindly said to my husband: “Here is what I want today babe- I want to go to Target and be free to roam the aisles as I please AND I want to go to the Olive Garden as I am craving meatballs. Now, I know that their meatballs probably have pork in them and I know that I don’t eat pork, but I really want meatballs and I really want Olive Garden food, so I’ll close my eyes and eat the meatballs and love it. Mmkay?”

So to Target we went. I posted this picture on Twitter to let my Tweeps that yes, I had arrived:

My heart fluttered as I walked in the door. I hadn’t been to Target in AGES- seriously- it’s been months. I avoid that place like the plague. When I had a job, back in Florida, I think I used to stop by Target at least once or twice a week after work on my way home. Yeah…when I had a job.

Now? I realize how expensive Target is… at least in comparison to my new home WalMart. Yes, I have forsake Target for WalMart. Ahhh Target, I’m so sorry, but you can’t beat WalMart’s prices! I will say this for you, though, WalMart ain’t got nothin’ on you in the clothes department. You have- and always will- sell cuter clothes and shoes than WalMart.

Anyway, I didn’t really get anything, I just wanted to go there. Picked up a dress for baby C, an outfit for my pending nephew, storage containers for C’s never-ending hair accessory pile, new and improved tweezers (uni-brows are not coming back in style y’all- plucking is necessary) and some very interesting and out-of-the box nail polish colors. I think… think… I may start painting my nails (gasp again- just for good measure)

I got in the car after our Target experience, looked over at Hubby and simply said “That was great, babe.”

The Olive Garden was awesome. After waiting for six years, we were able to snag a booth in the bar area and put C in a booster seat since it’s against fire code to have a high chair in the bar area. (Whatev)

A word about Baby girl and booster seats- yeah… it doesn’t work out well… she’s like an earthworm wiggling to the top of the soil right before a big rain. Yesterday, she purposely tried to throw herself under the table that we were eating at. I tried to stop her every time. I told my husband he needed to switch seats with me before I went buckwild on Baby C in the Olive Garden and whooped her ass (don’t worry anti-spanking parents. I don’t hit my kid…yet)

Anyway.

After a quick “settle down babe”, Hubby switched seats with me and was just as unsuccessful at getting our child to stop trying to get under the table. She finally got under said table and hit her head in the process- oh, but she doesn’t give a shit about hitting her head or falling or anything which may cause alarm to a normal human being- she was more concerned with being under the table.

Needless to say, that glass of Moscato that I ordered could have been two glasses of Moscato with her behavior. I told Hubby that taking Baby C out to eat is one of my least favorite activities. Seriously. That child needs a Ritalin. Sheesh.

So, that was my Mother’s Day- how was yours?

And if you are wondering what physical gift the Hubs got me for Mother’s Day- he got me a tattoo… well, he got me two tattoos actually. One is a private matter and below, you’ll find the other one.

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